Aug
24
There are some things in life that should not be tampered with. Period.
I get up early in the morning most days – early dawn and it’s still dark in the bedroom. Too dark to see well and in the winter, too dark to see at all. (What I’m doing up at that ungawdly hour of the day is well beyond me – my system simply started waking me up then and going back to sleep seems to be a waste of time so I just roll with whatever the auld bod is delivering)
It’s dark.
In the good old days, underwear manufacturers for men would put a label on the inside at the back. In the dark, you can slide your hands around the waistband, identify the label and get things in order. Getting things out of order is fairly uncomfortable as any guy will tell you.
Now. Underwear manufacturers put labels all over the damn things – front, back, inside, outside and in no consistent order. I reach into the drawer, quiety as to not wake the Princess, (I know where the shorts are) pull out a pair and start the process of identifying whether this label is the big advertising label (I note if I’m advertising something by showing my underwear it surely isn’t the damn company) Whether the label is the smaller inside the back or front label. Whether the label is larger than the other one and which goes where on which company underwear I’ve grabbed. I’ve got a plethora of labels and arrangements to pick from.
I’ve come up with several solutions. For example, only buy from one company. That works except they change label positions every few months as they bring out a new model (new models of men’s underwear – who knew!). Go out and put them on in the light (are you kidding, this is Canada – you get dressed as fast as you possible can to avoid frostbite except on July, 23 the day we have summer) And frostbite is something the important parts of my anatomy would truly appreciate avoiding.
I’m open to other solutions here but I’m afraid it’s not going to help matters. We have a sleeping princess who I refuse to wake up (for my good health), manufacturers who believe their label should be moved around and a dark bedroom.
Truly a problem for the modern male.
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